Nurse Ratched
6:19 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Dabbed daintily at the corner of my lips, more for effect than necessity. I know where my mouth is, after all.
(Seriously, what is so difficult about this process?)
However, I have in the past, stabbed myself in the lips with a fork, and tripped over the strap of my handbag in a restaurant.
I also knocked a glass of Jager (or however you spell it) over a man I was with in Wetherspoons.
There is a limit to my feminine elegance.
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ohgodno
6:11 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Nurse Ratched 5:53 Thu Dec 29
So you've never wiped your mouth with a napkin?
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park chan wook
6:09 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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If your ginger and bald I'd advice against it. It's a haunting look.
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ohgodno
6:08 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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LeroysBoots 3:04 Thu Dec 29
Don't drink mass produced lager. If I drink mass produced lager I get dandruff (head and beard). If I don't then I don't. I have no idea why.
Posh lager/IPA's/Bitters/Wine/Spirits etc etc etc... no effect.
You can trust this research. It's been an extremely well funded, longitudinal study (with an admittedly small subject group).
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riosleftsock
6:03 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Never leave it alone with kids.
Make sure it gets plenty of exercise.
A beard is not just for christmas.
If you're not sure, get a cat first.
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Cheezey Bell-End
5:59 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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I've tried, but after about 10 days, I can't stand the sensation anymore an take it off.
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park chan wook
5:58 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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I bet Mr Ts boyfriends sex muck will get caught in his beard.
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icwhs
5:57 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Manky, dirty, snotty and food catchers.
So 1975
Make you look older.
Forget it
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Nurse Ratched
5:57 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Thanks, I'll bear that In mind.
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icwhs
5:55 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Manky, dirty, snotty and food catchers.
So 1975
Make you look older.
Forget it
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Nurse Ratched
5:53 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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'Removing food from it is an ongoing process'
*blinks*
Are you sure it isn't just you being a bit spazzy? Can't you remember where your mouth is anymore? :-)
I'll be honest, I have sat here for a few minutes trying to work out how food can get stuck in your beard.
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joe royal
5:51 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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I saw an albino Sikh today in Goodmayes (ESSEX) had a crap beard.
The Stamford hill cowboys are impressively hirsute.
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Mart O
5:46 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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I knew that was going to happen
You can rely on defjam.
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defjam
5:42 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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BEARD CLAY!
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stomper
5:42 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Darlo Debs 4:09 Thu Dec 29
Removes Arran jumper made by mum 35 years ago
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Vexed
5:33 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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What on earth is beard food?
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park chan wook
5:32 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Go all out Billy Bonds beard, rough, tramp looking style. Don't buy beard trimmer oils and all that Shit, go hard as nails beard.
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Lertie Button
5:30 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Invest in a good set of giant size napkins, removing food from it is an ongoing process.
When you add to that the time spent washing, oiling and trimming it and of course the hours spent staring into space and stroking it with a thought full expression on your face, the commitment is not to be underestimated.
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Darlo Debs
4:09 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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You should.. Beards are good.
Just dont wear cable knit jumpers or you will have to take to sticking a finger in your ear and singing folk music
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REALGSA
3:43 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Go on amazon and buy the beard grooming trimmer, wax, oils and comb.
You must keep it neat, tidy and oiled when it gets itchy and flaky.
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1964
3:42 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Don't
1. you'll look like a hipster,
or
2. a CAMRA member
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